November 8, 2009
Occasionally I think it’s time to upgrade.
As most of you know, we recently retired the Honda Civic and upgraded to a Jaguar. Six years ago we traded in our perfectly good Country Club home for a mansion (mansion to us anyway) in the boondocks. Three years ago I traded in my jeans and sweaters wardrobe for slacks and jackets.
Trading up has generally served me well. But there are some things that have remained exactly the same.
Take my husband. (No really, take my husband – sorry, I couldn’t resist!) Though what hair he has left is greying, and there is more of him to love these days – especially around the love handle area, I am convinced that hanging onto him is well worth it. I mean, really, what is there to trade up to?
Who else would offer to make my cup of coffee in the morning, explaining that he knows exactly how I like it and then when I decline, offer to allow me to make his? “There are only four easy steps to making me a perfect cup of coffee.” He’s so helpful, and not the least bit affected by my dirty looks and worse language when he proffers such an offer.
Who else would do all those chores I find so loathsome, like attend the parent meetings and make small talk with the neighbors and call people on the phone to RSVP for parties? “I figured you didn’t want any part of that.” And he is so right.
Who else would tell me 30 pounds later that I am so skinny I’m verging on being sickly skinny? “Your jeans are hanging on you.” Although it does make me wonder exactly who he is comparing me to.
Who else would eat the last piece of chocolate and explain that he was doing me a favor. “I figured I was saving you calories.” How thoughtful.
Still, there are days…
Like the other day when I bought blistex rather than my favorite chapstick. The blistex came in a fruit smoothie flavor and was not at all waxy like chapstick can be. I felt young and exciting and couldn’t get over how tasty just licking my own lips was. I thought I was in heaven.
Until I woke up the next morning with chapped lips. I told myself it had been unseasonable windy the day before, applied my fruit smoothie blistex and went on my way. Until two hours later when the blistex ran out because I was applying it so often because it tasted so good I was licking it off at a pace faster than I could keep it applied, and I began to look for a drug store.
I found a local corner store and bought six chapsticks. One for my purse, one for my backpack, one for my pocket, one for my nightstand, one for my car and one for emergencies.
I twisted open the cherry chapstick and rubbed waxy emoillent all over my lips, onto part of my chin and into my upper lip – just to be safe.
Later in the day, my husband announced, “There’s something on your chin.” Instead of wiping it off, I rubbed it in vigorously.
“Thanks. It’s just chapstick.” I answered.
“Sure, I thought it was a booger,” he replied, smiling at me not at all repulsed at the idea that I might have a booger on my chin and not the least bit worried about how a booger had gotten onto my chin.
Somethings cannot be improved upon. My husband and chapstick, those are two I’m sticking with.
This week I will appreciate the tried and true.
