September 6, 2010
Or at least, that is what my mom brainwashed me into believing. And the way my life is going, I might be the most interesting woman in the world, though I don’t drink Dos Equis.
I have been trying to be bored. Seriously. For the past eight months I have been on high alert for trying to get everything accomplished, now that things are at a simmering pace, I’m wanting to be bored, but boredom eludes me.
Early in August I finished some professional development classes through University of Phoenix. Sure, my school district offered to provide the training to me at no charge, over the course of eight Wednesday nights from 6 until 10, but I couldn’t bear to part with those precious hours, so instead I opted to pay private, on-line university prices for the training which required me to “chat” on-line four nights a week, complete an individual assignment weekly and contribute to a group assignment weekly, for the last eight months. No one can accuse me of wanting a free handout, even when it’s offered. But, I am done now, and am waiting for withdrawal to kick in, wait, maybe it has since I no longer wake in the middle of the night wondering exactly what I need to post for the day and worrying that I forgot to post yesterday. Perhaps withdrawal of this sorts is sleeping through the night.
I have also been completing a book project (more details soon, waiting for final publication). I applied to speak at a conference and was accepted. Great news, except the proposal was based on a book project I hadn’t completed. In my sick mind, I figured if I had the conference staring me in the face, I would get the book project done. It worked – and I have the deep dark circles under my eyes to prove it. No, I did not hit myself in the face with the car door, I would tell you if my husband was punching me in the nose while I sleep. I actually do a fine job of torturing myself all be myself. So, I spoke at the conference two weeks ago and final publication of the book project should be next week. Now, I’m just waiting for the burning desire to complete another book project. There is a burn, but it’s heartburn from the pulled pork sandwich I ate last night at 11:30 right before going to bed.
And, my freelance projects have wound down. I am hoping to be offered another one, but not yearning for it. Actually, I’m hoping to get the yearning feeling soon.
Yes, I am still working on my Masters, but it feels like a walk along the beach at sunset compared to the circus act I’ve been recently.
And, I’m waiting to be bored. First, I had to get the yard and garden back in shape. Done. Then I had to start my workout routine again, I’m very sore most days, so done. And now “Anthony Bourdain’s No Reservations” is having a marathon. Really, I can’t get a break.
Boredom is the state I’m striving for currently. I know that all emotional states are transitory, and even nirvana doesn’t last for long, but boredom, yes, boredom would be nice, soon, please.
This week I will do as little as possible so as to induce boredom.
